LUMPENPROLETARIAT—A shaven and washed barbarian once said barbarism begins in the home. Working class life means we often lack access to mental health services. Having a safe space and a safe person to open up to, to confide in, when we need one is as much a luxury as a necessity. Yet, too many of us in the working class suffer this unmet need. And when facing interpersonal struggles in isolation, we may feel overwhelmed and/or engage in unhealthy coping behaviors, which may make life harder. Valuing one’s health, as essential to protecting one’s freedom, understanding psychology becomes very helpful.
In this in-depth interview, Inner Integration’s Meredith Miller spoke with author Dr. George Simon (In Sheep’s Clothing) about the narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) spectra. Both Miller and Simon are experts on the subject of NPD, and have worked with thousands of people dealing with similar interpersonal challenges. Indeed, Dr. Simon says NPD “plagues all of us” to a certain degree. However, the extremes can lead to major problems and abuse. Understanding NPD helps us better understand human psychology and each other.
Messina
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“Were you born to resist? Or be abused? Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?” —The Foo Fighters
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INTERVIEW NOTES:
- Miller introduced the main topics as understanding, and dealing with, manipulative people
- Dr. Simon began by explaining the term and concepts of “gaslighting”
- (c. 5:08) Awareness of NPD behaviors
DR. SIMON: (c. 5:49) “And, so, if you listen carefully, for the things they say—not to the things they say, but—for the things they say, the kinds of things they say, the kinds of tactics, that they’re using, observing how—you know when they’re making that plausible-sounding rationalization or excuse-making. When they’re doing that over and over again, that’s your tip-off.
And, so, I train clinicians to be on the lookout for these behaviors. They tend to rely on a few of them. I mention the most popular ones in my book.
But the fact is that a really skilled manipulator is capable of using just about anything because what they do is they prey on the conscientiousness of the other person. They count on the fact that their victim has this thing we call a conscience, whereby they have qualms. They have unsureness about themselves. They wanna do right. They don’t wanna be overly judgmental. They don’t wanna make a wrong judgment. They certainly wouldn’t want to ‘read’ somebody wrongly, or misconstrue a situation. They want to get it right. And the manipulator knows this and preys upon this.
Dr. George Simon
(c. 7:16)
- (c. 7:16) Meredith Miller agreed, and also added that, in her work helping people heal from narcissistic abuse and trauma bonding issues, many people from diverse cultures, ethnicities, nationalities, and backgrounds report encountering the same set of NPD behaviors. Dr. Simon elaborated on that point.
- (c. 11:15) “the character disturbance spectrum“
—snip—
- (c. 27:06)
- (c. 31:57)
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[18 OCT 2020]
[Last modified on 18 OCT 2020 at 13:43]